Rewarded!

I would like to take a moment to thank my friend over at Maloquacious for bestowing Inspired Every Moment with the Sunshine Blogger Award. I am always so pleased to be recognized, and I love knowing that the things written here are having an impact on others. It is because of these small recognitions that I am constantly inspired to write and share here on WordPress. 

With all awards comes great responsibility… So, there are now a few things I must do. 
They are:

• Include the award logo in a post or on the blog (——–>)
• Include a link to the person who nominated you (Maloquacious)
• Write 10 random things about yourself
• Nominate ten other bloggers who “positively and creatively inspire others in the blogosphere”, plus let them know you nominated them

10 Random Things About Me:

1. I am a single mother of two children
2. I ate a ‘Smore’ for the first time in my life this past weekend. 
3. I have never been on a boat despite the fact that I live in a city that is surrounded by water. 
4. I start each and every day by choosing something to be Thankful for. 
5. I love good food, but do not enjoy cooking it unless I have company. 
6. I think Spring, Summer and Fall should be the only seasons. Winter should be banned. 
7. Nail polish rarely lasts more than a day on my nails at the most. 
8. I am easily distracted. 
9. I have always wanted a Princess bedroom.
10. I have hundreds of posts sitting in my drafts folder waiting to be edited, written and published. 

And now for my own 10 nominations: 

1. Positive Aspect of Life 

2. Source of Inspiration

3. Travel Destination Bucket List 

4. NOMAD Youth

5. The Blue Art Project

6. Love Well Live Well

7. Secret Shade

8. Elephant on a High Wire

9. Bumble and Sass

10. Mind. Set. Go.

Be sure to check out the sites above, each is worth the read, and can share so many great things with you. 

Again to my friend over at Maloquacious, Thank-you so very much for the honor of this award.

 

Until Next Time…

Write On!

10 Things You Should Stop Doing Because It May Change Your Life…

1. Stop Being Lazy – It is so easy to be lazy, in every sense of the word. How much easier is it to simply say we are too busy, or too comfortable, than to actually bust our butts on something we ‘would/could’ do? Stop letting yourself make excuses and pass up opportunities that can help you grow or move you forward. When you are asked to join in on something, or invited to try something new do it. You never know where a new path might lead you.
2. Stop Looking For Something Wrong – Our mind can be our worst enemy at times, as people we tend to over think things to the point of creating problems. The old saying “if it seems too good to be true, it probably is” is a bunch of junk.. If something is not right you will ‘know it’ in your heart, but don’t look for problems where there are none. This is especially true when it comes to relationships, when you look for something to be wrong you end up inviting it in yourself.
3. Stop Being Mediocre  - Getting by may have been good enough when you were a lazy teenager, but it won’t get you anything in the real world. This applies to every situation you face, whether it is work, play or hobbies make the choice to put 110% into everything you do and make an effort to shine. Why simply get by when you can soar? When we put our hearts into the things we are doing it becomes more fun, interesting and rewarding.
4. Stop Lying (to yourself and others) – It might amaze you to find how often you lie, not only to those around you, but to yourself as well. Lies can range from small to large, and usually occur for seemingly legitimate reasons, but the truth is a lie is a lie. Period. Try to stop telling lies and instead find a positive way of telling the truth, this is possible (even when your wife is asking you if she looks fat). Make a conscious effort to avoid little lies and invite in positive energy.
5. Stop Your Anger – Anger can have a huge impact on your life, and learning to curb our anger is a tool that is not taught enough when we are young. In fact, anger is instilled in us as ‘bad thing’, and because of this we never really learn how to deal with it as an honest emotion. Next time you are feeling angry, stop and think about why… Usually anger is cover-up for another emotion so ask yourself what it is that is really bothering you and address that problem. Chances are your anger will disappear and you will find that you were actually hurt or sad and not truly ‘angry’.
6. Stop Running In Circles – If we don’t learn from our mistakes, if we don’t make choices and changes, we are doomed to walk the same path time and time again. How many times have you asked yourself, ‘when is this going to stop?’ The answer is simple, it will stop when you make the choice to change it. Stop running in circles and pick a direction to go.
7. In Fact, Stop Running – Not only do we need to stop running in circles, we need to stop running altogether. Life slips by in the blink of an eye, this is something you realise as you get older, especially once you have children, why speed up the process by zipping through each day with little time to spare. Take some time each day, as often as possible, to simply be. Enjoy those little moments, and walk a step or two slower than you were before. Time is a precious gift, don’t waste it.
8. Stop Judging – How can you judge another person that you do not know? How can you judge something you have never tried? How does it feel when you know it is happening to you? Judgement is a form of negative thinking that closes doors in our life. When you judge another person or situation before you find out what it is truly about you are holding yourself back. Some of the greatest things that have happened in my life, and some of the greatest people I have encountered, were ones I never thought I would enjoy. Don’t close doors until you have searched the contents of the room.
9. Stop Blaming Yourself – This is a BIG one, should probably be at the top of the list, but being so obvious I thought it would fit in here. You can not blame yourself for everything, this is yet another thing that will get you nowhere in life. The main things we blame ourselves for are those things which we can not control, the actions of others. Get rid of blame altogether, forget that it exists. If something goes wrong take no of the lesson and move on. Blaming yourself, or anyone else for that matter, is not going to change a thing, it has no use in your life.
10. Stop Dwelling – Like the ideas above, dwelling on things that have happened in the past is going to hold you in place in your life. We all have those actions or encounters that we wish we had done differently. Heck, I think I would redo 3/4 of my life given the chance, but I also realize that every single thing that has happened to me, every person I have met and challenge I have faced has been for a reason.. Even if just to make me who I am today. It is important that you let go of the what ifs, of the would have, should have, or could have, and use these lessons in the future. You can acknowledge your past, confront your demons, but don’t let them get comfortable in your present or they are doomed to follow you into your future.

Until Next Time…

Just Stop!

 

Possibly Related  or Helpful Articles:

• Myths About Anger… (behindthemaskofabuse.com)
• Anger Management Techniques (kesirajuramprasad.wordpress.com)

5 Tips To Help You Deal With Change

It may be hard for an egg to turn into a bird: it would be a jolly sight harder for it to learn to fly while remaining an egg. We are like eggs at present. And you cannot go on indefinitely being just an ordinary, decent egg. We must be hatched or go bad.
C. S. Lewis 

It is time I talk about change on this site. Change is one of those things in life that are inevitable, that happen constantly, and that we often fight tooth and nail without even knowing it, and it still happens anyway.

I won’t write a post today called “How to deal with change” because it is not about ‘how’ it is about “Why”… When we are faced with big changes in our life we often ask ‘why’.. Why should I deal with this?

The answer is simple, and a bit brutal as well…

because you have to!

Change will happen whether you like it or not. The weather changes regularly, the area you live in, the world around you. Everything changes, these days even faster than ever before, and even if you choose to ignore that fact these changes are going to happen anyway.

I have faced a great deal of changes in my life recently, many of which I embraced, but a few that I fought with all my strength putting them off and prolonging the process. By doing this, by fighting the inevitable, I was dragging out the discomfort that comes along with big changes, and in reality I was causing myself more pain then I needed to.

I went through a separation, one that I know understand was long overdue, but I kept putting it off thinking that something would change.. Yet, all along things were changing I was just too opposed to see it. I wanted the change to happen the way that I wanted it to happen, but that is the funny thing about change; it gives you exactly what you need, not necessarily what you want.  So I fought it, for months, holding on to an image in my mind that didn’t exist and finding myself miserable in the process.

It was not until I realized that no matter what I did or tried the change was going to happen, and I realized that I needed to make a choice; I could either embrace the change now, or have to deal with it later. I chose to embrace it now, and I am happier than I have ever been. You see, my partner and I were not in love, we were not happy with each other and there was no way we were going to be. Sure, we had moments where we had fun, where we were friends, but the love that we shared was simply an image in our minds.  For me this realization was a sad one. I wanted it to be different, and though the opportunity for change was in front of me all along, it was not the type of change I wanted. I wanted the world to change my feelings, to change my relationship, to change my partners personality altogether… Change does not happen that way, and so I chose to ‘let go’.

Letting go is not easy, in fact it took me a long time, but once I made the choice the change took over and gave me what I had needed all along, power.

We face changes everyday, big and small. Some are clear and simple choices that we make unknowingly, where others tear our souls apart. Change will never be simple, it will never be comfortable, but it can be easier if we allow it to be. Below are a few tips that may help you cope better while facing changes in your life. This advice will probably not save you tears when you face heartache, it may not heal wounds, there is no avoiding the way things make us feel. Hopefully though, this advice can help you to accept change more openly and trust that it is giving you exactly what you need in the long run.

How (and Why) you should deal with change:

1. Free Your Feelings: Our emotions are within us for a reason so let them out without fear. If you want to cry, cry. Laugh if you desire and talk when you must. Allowing your feelings to flow freely will help speed up the process involved in change and allow you to move forward faster.
2. Create Positive Thoughts: No matter how hard the change it is not going to be easier if you are constantly seeing it in a negative way. Instead, turn your negative thinking around and find the ‘silver lining’ in the action. (When I was going through my separation I wrote down all the positive things that would come of this big change and carried it with me at all times) By creating positive images around the struggle you are facing you are opening your mind to a new point of view. This will help you accept the changes and help you use them to better your life in the end.
3. Set Goals: When you see a big change on the horizon and you are feeling scared set small goals that will move you in that direction. It is not fair to think that all change is going to move in on us gracefully, in fact most of the big changes we face in life challenge us to our very core, but that does not mean we have to run screaming for the hills (or in my case hang on for dear life) Instead, use the approaching change as a chance to choose your own direction, or in the very least the journey there.
4. Ditch The Denial: One of the biggest things we do that makes change so difficult is to deny it. When we stop denying the obvious we allow ourselves to be more relaxed and open to opportunity. This is one of the hardest habits to break, but it is worth the effort. It takes not physical effort on your part but it does require you open your mind and simply let yourself and your life be as it is. Acknowledge the change and instead of denying it consider where it can take you.
5. Embrace and Trust: Knowing that the change is coming is the first step, the last step is to embrace the change and trust that the world is giving you what you need to be a better, happier and more fulfilled person. Once you have done this you will not fear anymore, you may still cry, you may still want to run or fight, but you will know in your heart that what is meant to be will be. Remind yourself; “If it doesn’t happen now, it will happen later” perhaps not in the same form, and it is sure to be harder the longer you postpone, but one way or another change will happen. It is inevitable.

Until Next Time…

Move and Grow with the World!

What are some of the ways that you deal with the big changes in your life? 
What changes have you been dealing with recently?
What advice would you give to other that are facing the same changes you have?

As always feel free to share your thoughts and comments on the site.
Questions or Submissions can be forwarded to: inspiredeverymoment@outlook.com

15 Things To Give Up

Just Live Your Life!

There will always be those people in your life that disagree with your choices, actions or lifestyle. No matter how hard you try not to chances are you will always offend someone, you will always find someone you’re “letting down”.  There will always be people who you are making unhappy, but as long as it is not yourself you are going in the right direction. 

When we let go of the need to constantly please others and begin focusing on pleasing ourselves we often find that life gets easier, and we feel happier overall.

The word ‘selfish‘ is overused in the world today. Being selfish has nothing to do with making yourself happy, or doing what feels good for you. For some reason people have taken the word selfish and twisted into something it should never be about. In fact, were it up to me, the word would simply be erased from the English language. It has no place.

Is it selfish to want to be happy? To do what you like to do? Is it selfish to do something that feels good?

The answer is “No”. The answer is always No!

Chances are if something makes you truly happy, or you truly love doing it, it is not being done with a negative intent. Sure, there may be people who are unhappy about what it is you are choosing to do, or how you are doing it. There might be people who tell you it is wrong, or “selfish” of you. They may say it hurts them, or angers them, but that is THEIR problem, not yours.

Perhaps that was a little harsh, but think about it for a minute… If you love eating seafood but your husband thinks it is gross do you avoid it simply because he doesn’t approve? No. Instead you might choose not to offer it to him, or you might avoid eating it directly in front of his face, but if you are craving a piece of fish why should you suffer simply because of the opinion or approval of someone else? Is it hurting your husband when you eat seafood? Unless he is deathly allergic, I seriously doubt it. So… Why not?

Life is the same as that piece of fish. Perhaps it is not always your husband who disapproves, but chances are there is always going to be someone who does. If it is not being done to cause intentional harm to others, and it is something you enjoy, then just do it. Do it simply because you want to do it! Period! 

This is a simple idea that people find very difficult to wrap their heads around because we are so rooted on the idea that doing things simply for ourselves because we “want to” is selfish. Well I say ‘get over it‘!

When we stop focusing on what others think, or how they feel, when we let go of the result of the action and instead choose simply to enjoy that action, we end up happier and we actually enjoy life more. 

Doing things that make you happy just because you want to can have a huge impact on your life. It will give you:

• More confidence
• Increased happiness
• Inspiration
• Ambition
• Reduce stress
• Increased pleasure 

The benefits outweigh the cons every single time. Of course, there will be those in your life that try to hinder you, that aim to hold you back or bring you down… Do it anyway. If they are meant to be in your life they will find a way to get over it and look for ways to make themselves happy.

I have found that people sabotage our happiness for a number of reasons, the most common being that they are unhappy themselves. Maybe they don’t know what their own passion is, or who they are, or what they want in life… Don’t let someone else’s journey (or lack thereof) hold you back from yours. Do what you love simply because of the fact that you love it. Plain and Simple.

In fact, Start Now!!!

 

Until Next Time…

Live Your Life!

 

Please feel free to share your thoughts in the comments section below, or email questions, comments and submissions to: inspiredeverymoment@outlook.com

 

Possibly Related Articles:

• Where did my self go? (shametalk.wordpress.com)
• The Dark Side: Fight Your Negative Emotions (Rasatala) (dragonplume.wordpress.com)
• Bitch Don’t Kill My Vibe. (cornerpolitics.wordpress.com)
• Happy People (coca-cola.com)
• Lay aside selfishness (livingmoreabundantly.wordpress.com)
• Ego and Selfishness (eddyfy.net)
• The Problem with Happiness (lovefrombenin.wordpress.com)
• Being selfish isn’t about being wrong, but happy. (thedailyquirk.com)
• Be Selfish. Be Very Selfish. (blogs.hbr.org)
• Being Selfish (organisedclutter.wordpress.com)

Dirty Dishes

I have seen this little poem everywhere and I have even made a copy for my kitchen. I thought it was such a cute and positive message that I should share it here with you. So enjoy…
I am not sure where it originated from and if anyone knows please tell me so I can add a link to give credit where it is due.

Until Next Time…
See The Silver Lining

Leave The Past Behind

It can be hard to let go of the past, there are usually fond memories and moments that we cherish. There may also be hurt, sadness or questions that have been unanswered there as well. The past is a part of us, and for many the thought of leaving that part of us behind is a difficult concept to grasp.
Why would you want to leave behind a part of  who you are??

The truth is, it is not that you actually need to ‘leave‘ it, instead you need to address it and move forward in the moment. The past can be a great lesson when we look at it the right way, but when we dwell on it and live in it we run the risk of missing the moment that is here in front of us.

Leaving your past behind does not mean you forget it, it simply means that you take the good parts and use them as fuel to create more in this moment. The same idea goes for the bad things that have happened to you, rather than regret them or question them look at them as lessons and make the choice to use them as tools toward a better future. Keep these memories close to your heart, but clear your mind for the moment at hand.

 

Until Next Time…

Live in the moment!

 

What are your fondest memories from your past?
How have they helped shape you into the person you are today? 
What are some of the more difficult lessons that you have had to learn in life?
How have you turned them into a positive part of your future?

*Please share your thoughts/stories in the comments section below*

Stories or submissions for the site can be sent to: inspiredeverymoment@outlook.com
(Please state if you wish to remain anonymous)

Possibly Related or Helpful Articles

• The Past: It’s There but It Isn’t? (xbeautifulxdisasterx21.wordpress.com)
• Memory Is (clairebogdanos.net)
• in our darkest moments, forgiveness, and love (alwayscoffee.wordpress.com)
• Past, Present & Future! (pbabli.com)
• Take Your Present Back: The Past Is Not a Trap (coriwong.com)
• On importance of going public on Narcissistic Abuse and how to find strength to divorce/leave the destructive relationship (maiaramusings.wordpress.com)
• Meeting the real You. (globeinspired.wordpress.com)

Ignore Your Negative Self…

Today is the day you need to choose to be the best you possible.
Right now is the moment you need to stop standing in your own way!

10 Great Date Ideas That Will Help You Connect With Your Friends

“Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art….
It has no survival value;
rather it is one of those things which give value to survival.”
- C.S. Lewis, The Four Loves

 

Friends can be an important part of the foundation we build to create a positive and happy life. They can be a shoulder to cry on when we are feeling down, and someone to share our laughter with when we are feeling good. They are often our go-to guide when we don’t know what to do, and our motivation when we need a push.

Friends are more than a gift, they are a treasure, and all too often as we grow older we grow distant from our friends. It is not that we are not still friends, it is simply that life tends to get in the way of the old friendships that were once the center of our lives.

When we were younger our lives revolved around our friends, we shared not only our deepest secrets with them but also our valuable time. As we grow older we tend to be distracted by life, and that precious time with friends becomes less of a priority. This is not something that can easily be avoided, and it is simply a part of life, but you can make the choice to make time with friends a priority on a more regular basis and make that time quality time.

Below are some “date ideas” for you and you dearest friend(s). Make a point to get together once a month/week (or as often as possible at set intervals) and enjoy each others company. It is a great way to unwind and escape everyday life, as well as promote positivity.

10 Great Date Ideas That Will Help You Connect With Your Friend(s):

1. Enjoy an evening picnic. – Set yourselves up on a blanket under the stars with some snacks and a bottle of wine. Stay up late and share all the things you are too afraid to tell anyone else, just like you used to do with your best friends when you were fifteen. 
2. Splurge and Save. – Check out online savings sites like Groupon and WagJag and score yourself a deal on a swanky night out for you and your friend. Many upscale restaurants offer amazing deals through these sites that will give you an excuse to dress-up and spoil yourselves while saving money at the same time.
3. Cook Creatively. – Get together as a group or pair and have fun cooking a meal or treat neither of you have ever made before. Not only do you get to learn something new together, but you get to enjoy eating your creation afterwards. If you like wine, enjoy a bit of that while you cook as well. 
4. Host a post-prom party. - High school reunions only happen once in a while, but sometimes we want to see all of our old friends soon than that. Why not host a post-prom party and have everyone dress up in ridiculous prom-inspired gear? You can keep it cozy at home or arrange VIP at a local nightclub and party like it’s 1999. (Don’t forget to take a lot of pictures you can laugh at later)
5. Have a sleepover. – Even if you have to escape to a cheap motel for the night, grab your very best friend, some sappy movies, nail polish, and some popcorn and snuggle up under the covers for an old school sleepover that reflects your younger years. 
6. Shop till you drop. – As grown-ups trips to the local mall have lost the luster they once held. Grab your friends and hit the shops together, even if it is just to pick up necessities, a trip to the store with friends always makes it seem more fun.
7. Take a road trip. - Life’s responsibilities may not allow you the time you used to have for a long-weekend getaway, but hoping in the car with a friend and taking a short local road trip can be just as rewarding and fun. Grab a few friends and drive to a local attraction or beach you have wanted to visit, or even to nowhere in particular. Sometimes it is just fun to get in the car and drive with no set destination. Even if you only have a few hours to spare this can be a fun activity and give you a chance to connect with one another.
8. Amp up the adventure. – Visiting an amusement park or local fun fair can be a great outing with friends. When we are young these places scream adventure, and chances are you haven’t actually enjoyed this type of outing for your own benefit in a long time. If you have children you may have been to an adventure park recently, but have you done it simply for your own pleasure? Get together with your friends and take on all those rides that were too scary when you were younger. 
9. Play Tourist. – Spend the day exploring your city. This is especially fun if you live in different cities than one another. Pick a day and have your friend lead you to all their favorite spots, and then do the same for them on another outing. This is a great way to spend time together and learn more about the person you usually know best in the world. 
10. Thrift up a whole new you. – Meet you best friends at the local thrift shop and give each other a complete makeover. Find the best look for your friends, and splurge to buy the outfits for each other. Follow it up with dinner and a movie, or a night out wearing your new finds.

These are only a few ideas, the point is to set aside time to spend with your friends. It will help keep you centered and remind you of yet another thing to be thankful for in your life. Don’t let those that are important to you drift away, hold them close to your heart and share your happiness.

Related articles

• Friends For a Lifetime (dmkea2011sped.wordpress.com)
• Good Friends, Good Health (everydayfamily.com)
• Is it possible for you to build a friendship with your parents? (amcpress.wordpress.com)
• What is Friendship? (tammybruneman.wordpress.com)
• The Power of Friendship (jacobihaveloved.wordpress.com)
• Friendship (dustedmind.wordpress.com)
• Friendship Maturing Through the Years (patinspire.org)
• 4 Steps to Maintaining Friendships with Those Who Don’t Have Children (everydayfamily.com)

Simple Suggestions for a Stronger Relationship

Every relationship faces highs and lows, the small things that at the start of a relationship were cute and quirky can become annoying or irritating with time.

Life’s daily routines, unexpected  struggles, and everyday stress can take their toll on our relationships. When the honeymoon period is over and real life kicks into gear it can be easy to forget that relationships actually take a lot of hard work and effort to maintain. Reality is not like fairy tales portray it to be, and that is not necessarily a bad thing, the energy required to nurture our relationships is also what nurtures us as people and helps us to grow. 

Not all of our efforts have to be hard, when it comes to relationships one thing that helps is to stay focused on your partners positive qualities, and to strengthen your bond whenever you can. It is too easy to get caught up in negativity, and we often lose sight of all those simple things that we love so much about one another, as well as the little things that make our relationships great.

Below are a few easy suggestions that may help you to strengthen your bond and focus on the positive aspects of your relationship.

An Exercise in Appreciation

Being thankful is an excellent way to invite and encourage positivity in all aspects of your life, relationships are no different. I preach about the power of gratitude all the time on this site, and I can not stress enough the impact it can have on your relationship. In the chaos of daily life it is easy to ignore our words, especially when it comes to the way we interact with our partner. When was the last time you told your partner how much you truly appreciate them? I don’t mean a simple “Thank-you” I mean a real from the heart conversation about how much they have added to your life. Chances are it has been a while, if at all.

Appreciation is something that every one of us craves, it is what drives human beings to be better people and to go out of their way to help others. We often feel under appreciated by those who are closest to us because when we get comfortable with someone we feel less of a need to reassure them of our gratitude. It is a strange concept that we are more likely to say thank you to a stranger in the supermarket then our own spouse, but it is true. We often feel as if the people closest to us should know we care simply through our actions, and in a sense it is true, but hearing real words of appreciation always feels good. Think about the last time someone thanked you, it probably felt really good. What if you could have that same good feeling on a daily basis? Well, you can. Make the choice to openly share your appreciation more as a couple and you can constantly bask in that glorious feeling.

How to do this:

There are a number of ways to show your appreciation to your partner, one of my favorite ways is the three things game. Each day make a point to share three things you appreciate about one another, it can be small things or big things, whatever comes to mind at the time. Perhaps your hubby took the trash out without being asked, or maybe he loosened the lid on the peanut butter jar, be sure to show you appreciation for this small act or any others at least three times a day. Once you start sharing all the things that you are thankful for you will find there are many more there to appreciate.

Laugh a Little. 

Laughter really is the best medicine and when we are having trouble at home, or feel stressed out in our daily lives this is usually the first area that suffers. Make a point to laugh more often with your partner and watch your bond grow.  Laughter releases endorphins and helps us to connect with others, it can bring you closer to your partner and ease tensions that have lingered in your life.

How to do this:

The key to this process is to use laughter in a positive way that you can both enjoy. Do not use laughter to cover up other emotions or hide real issues, instead use it as a tool for you both to unwind. Take time each week to watch a funny movie or visit a comedy club, tell jokes to one another, and poke fun at something that is funny for both of you. You can use humor to defuse conflict when possible, but be sure it is humorous for both of you and being used at appropriate times.  The point is to have fun together and share a laugh, without it being at anyone’s expense.

Brag About It. 

Bragging is often seen in a negative light, but in reality bragging can be a useful tool when it comes to your relationship. Women especially are known for our overactive vocal chords, and we usually run to our closest friends in order to dissect something that our partner has done wrong. This tactic may seem to help, and will often make us feel better temporarily  but it is not a long-term solution and often leads to negative thinking in the future.  Sure, discussing your issues with another person can help bring them into perspective, but too often (and rightfully so) our friends are simply taking our side. This act of solidity is a sign of a great friend, but it is not helping your relationship in any way at all.

How to do this:

Instead of calling up Sally every time your husband forgets to put the toilet seat down, burns breakfast, or doesn’t notice your new haircut, call her every time that he says something nice, or does something right. Bragging about your spouse is not meant to make others envious, and it is not meant to be a means of pretending that life is great. What bragging does is get our minds focused on the positive aspects of our partner that are so easy to forget or neglect. Make a point of biting your tongue about the negative things you are feeling, and like the exercise above, share your appreciation instead.

Amp Up Affections.

By affection I do not necessarily mean sex, although the benefits of sex on your relationship are many, I am talking more about the effects that a simple touch can have on your partner.  Even the slightest touch can have an effect on a person, in fact there are studies that show gently touching your partner’s hand while you are speaking to one another can greatly increase the feeling of connection and actually improve overall listening.

How to do this:

This activity can be done anywhere, anytime and often. It is a great way to strengthen an already strong bond, or cultivate one that has struggled. Your touch should not be invasive, and should come naturally, this is especially important in relationships where physical contact has been lacking for extended periods. Focus on small caring gestures in these cases such as, a hand resting on a forearm, brushing a thigh, or resting on your partners hand during conversation. When things progress or you feel comfortable move forward to a loving embrace, or a back rub. These simple, non-sexual acts can build a connection over time which will eventually lead back to the bedroom in a relationship that has been astray of sexual activity for a while. This is not foolproof and will not repair underlying issues, but it can help to build a connection when coupled with the correct forms of therapy or other connective acts.

Love Within.

The old saying ‘you must love yourself before you can truly love another‘ is a statement that holds a deep truth. Without first being comfortable with ourselves we will never be in the right place to be comfortable with another person. Confidence can have a huge impact on your relationship. When you are not feeling good about yourself it tends to reflect on your partner. If you are feeling down on yourself it is important that you take time to nurture yourself before you will be able to nurture your relationship.

A note on this:

I will not say, “how to do this” because it differs from person to person and varies depending on the inner issues at play, but there are many ways you can work on your own confidence if it is simply mild discomfort you are suffering from. Take time to do things that make you happy, spend time with people who make you feel good, and take up hobbies that you enjoy. Take care of yourself, and pamper yourself when you are feeling down.

These are all very basic ideas and will only help in mild cases. If you feel that you are suffering from a deep lack of self-confidence or depression of any kind it is important that you seek outside help. It is also important that you share these thoughts and feelings with your partner in order to gain the support you need. It might seem scary but remember this is the person you love, and the one you have chosen to share your life with on some level. Chances are your partner does not know what you are feeling and is just as confused as you are, or perhaps is feeling as if they are to blame for your overall unhappiness. Open up to those who are closest to you, share your need for support and your true emotions. Seek help from a professional, and do not be afraid.

(Please note: You are always welcome to share any thoughts/feelings here on this site, or you can reach me personally at inspiredeverymoment@outlook.com  should you need to talk, or just want someone to listen.)

There are millions of other ways to connect with your partner, these are only a few. Feel free to share your ideas in the comments section below and stay tuned for more relationship posts in the future. This post is not a guarantee for any relationship  and may not solve any issues you may be having, but they may also help on some level and can often build upon a bond that is already there. Positivity is a powerful tool to invite into your life as well as your relationship, and doing so in any way is sure to be beneficial.

What are some of the ways that you connect with your partner when life seems to get in the way? How do you use positivity to enhance your relationship? 

 

Until Next Time…

Love Deeply, Passionately, and Positively. 

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